Philophobia - An Ereri Fanfiction
by I Write Prophecies
Summary: Philophobic Levi is a famous jounalist writing for a popular magazine in New York. When he crosses paths with graduating Psychology student Eren and begins to have visions of his pastlife and their connection, his world is turned upside down. A rollercoaster ride from start to finish, with highs and lows. Brace yourself for an end that will leave you speechless.
1. Chapter 1 - Coffee Beans

**Philophobia – Chapter One **

_**Levi's POV**_

_Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Thump. _Drowsily, Levi raised his hand from the alarm clock's snooze button. He rolled over in his bed and buried his face in the pillow. _That was a terrible night's sleep, _he thought to himself. He had fallen asleep at 4 in the morning writing an article and had woken up at 6 for his journalist job at the local magazine. Warily, he sat up, rubbing his eyes. He stared out at the large tinted window which sat suspended on the wall adjacent to his bed. The window was misted and covered with little droplets of rain from the storm the night before. Levi stood up, shivering in the morning air and walked over to the window. The sky was a dull gray, thick with storm clouds. Sleet was falling off of the neighboring condominiums; large skyscrapers with blue tinted windows now greyed with the falling rain. He drew a figure in the fog accumulated on the cold glass. Far below, cars were bustling along the busy streets, full of people commuting to get to work on time. Levi chuckled as he turned on his heel and fell back on his bed.

His chest burned with the same usual lingering feeling he had whenever he woke up. It felt like having someone pour boiling hot coffee on your chest continuously. He groaned and shambled out of bed, swinging open the washroom door. He took a quick, freezing cold shower and he brushed his teeth in silence. He contemplated if he had time to boil a pot of coffee, still feeling fatigued from the night before. He spit out the toothpaste and stared at his reflection in the mirror. He was getting thinner, and he had dark, prominent dark circles which hung around his grey eyes. His pale skin glowed in the dim washroom light, shadows outlining his chiselled abs. His physique often made up for the fact that he stood only 5'3". He combed his ebony black hair, undercut and parted in the middle, before flickering off the washroom light. Across from his bed was a grand wardrobe and vanity, with a small chair beside it. Rows and rows of suits and dress shirts lined the wardrobe walls, with a selection of ties lining one of the doors. Levi reached in and grabbed one of his black dress shirts, black dress pants as well as a red tie. After dressing quickly and a brief glance in the mirror for approval, he hurried down the stairs from his bedroom loft to the main area of the studio apartment.

Levi's apartment wasn't particularly big, as he felt no need to occupy extra space. However, it was very neat and up kept, not to mention very modern and expensive, considering it was located in the heart of the city. Levi was a bit of a clean freak, so whenever guests came over, he would obsess over every little detail in making sure the apartment was spotless. The bottom of the loft stairs leads to the central living room. In the corner directly under the loft is another gigantic window, as well as some white couches with a steely grey throw and a red and white carpet. A large flat screen T.V. sat across from a coffee table, covered in magazines and a laptop. To the left of him was the kitchen, equipped with updated, stainless steel appliances. The cabinets were dark brown with white countertops. A coffee pot, sat perched at the end of one of the counters, was often Levi's only relief after pulling all-nighters. You see, he suffered from a terrible case of insomnia and often had trouble breathing at night, though he refused to see a doctor. A dining table rested right of the kitchen and the main entrance door, with two doors on the right hand wall; one leading to an office and another to a second washroom. Among all this, a large crystal chandelier hung high above the dining table.

Levi pulled open the kitchen cabinet, reaching for a box of Corn Flakes. As he fixed himself a bowl of cereal, he walked over to the living room couch, turning on the news on to watch for any new stories to write about. _34 Injured and 7 Dead: Fatal Train Crash in Maine. Editors of Newspaper in Tennessee Wanted for Publishing Political Propaganda. New Elections, New Candidates: What will the democrats pull this time? _Levi bit onto the spoon hard. Recently, there hasn't been any good stories or anything inspiring to write about. _Only Politics and Tragedies._ He sighed, deciding it would be better to turn off the television because all the white noise made by the reporters made his head ache.

After pacing around his flat aimlessly for what seemed like eternity with a bowl of cereal in his hand, he rinsed out the dirty plate and grabbed his coat. He dashed out of the flat, quickly locking the door behind him, and made his way to the elevator. Once inside, he checked his hair in the mirror before another lady dressed in a tight red dress entered the elevator. She had her blonde hair curled into ringlets and was wearing a small, black jacket on top of her dress. Her black heels clicked on the polished marble floor, and she was laden with a thick layer of sweet perfume. Levi cringed slightly, crinkling his nose. _Ugh, she's wearing enough of that crap to kill a goddamn horse. _As soon as the elevator open, Levi pushed pass the lady and walked out the main lobby, tightening the coat around him as he stepped into the cold city air.

He walked down the busy street. He didn't need to drive to work because his office was the building across from his condo. He huddled together, shoving his hands into his pockets and watching his breath become tangible in the frigid air. His small frame meant it was hard to keep warm in cold weather like this, so his hands were always dry and freezing. The rain had stopped slightly and it was only drizzling. However, the ground was still covered in puddles, which made a little splash as Levi speed along the street. He pushed his way through a hoard of people; a man talking on the phone with his girlfriend about date plans, a group of woman talking about a project at work, a stranger stopping to help a woman who had become lost. All these conversations made Levi's head spin.

_This world is made up of the white noise of insignificant conversations and unimportant things, _He sighed, crossing the street while a loud car horn went off somewhere in the distance. Some described Levi as emotionless, heartless sometimes. His co-worker, Hanji, described him as philophobic, meaning he was afraid of love and relationships with people which leads him to have a cold attitude towards others. But Levi simply shook the thought out of his head. _She speaks nonsense. I'm fine at getting along with others. _He paused to look at his reflection in one of the store mirrors, with the mannequins sneering at him. _Am I Afraid of Love?_ He wondered.

"Levi? Levi!" Levi turned his head quickly to see Hanji waving at him from the front of the office doors. He smiled and walked towards her. Hanji was a natural beauty. Beautiful long, reddish-brown hair which cascaded down to her shoulders (though she usually wore it up in a bun), with doe-like brown eyes that were every bit as energetic and exciting as her personality. She wore a long, brown coat which went up to her knees, with matching brown boots. She was huddled together too, rubbing her hands together as she gestured for him to come over quicker.

"Hello Hanji. Beautiful morning, isn't it?" Levi said in his usual sarcastic tone, pushing and holding the door open for her. "The sun hasn't shown this bright in decades." He chuckled, showing the security at the entrance of the building his identification, as Hanji showed hers pulling out her wallet. She bumbled through the door, clearing the fog off of her glasses that accumulated from the humidity outside. She simply frowned, pressing the button to call the elevator.

"You didn't get enough sleep last night." She stated as they walked into the elevator. Hanji pulled out some lipstick from her purse and began to apply it in the elevator mirror. "You look like you have black eyes, or you are wearing eye liner and missed your eyes. But I know your makeup skills are better than that." She giggled to herself, as Levi elbowed her in the rib. He adjusted his tie as the door opened and they stepped out into the office corridor.

"Hey, at least I slept last night." He said, briefly greeting the secretary and pushing open the large glass doors to the rest of the floor. He walked past rows of offices, with some people in the middle of meetings. He spotted his boss, Erwin, presenting something to the lower reporters, and waved before turning the corner. His office was on the corner, completely surrounded by windows, exactly how he liked it. Levi took off his jacket and hung it on a hook on the wall and wiped his shoes on the doormat. There was a desk in the corner with a computer, as well as a filing cabinet and a couple of chairs. Levi also requested to have his own personal coffee maker, which was currently sitting on top of the filing cabinet, amidst a clutter of papers and reports. He didn't tell anyone, but there was a storage of hand sanitizer in one of the drawers because he always felt like the office workspace was full of germs people carried around, which made him sick to even think about it.

Levi sat in his chair and pulled up the latest work he had been working at on the desktop. He was writing this article on the effects of sleep and the human body, how badly lack of sleep deteriorates it and how beneficial it is for us to get enough. It made Levi laugh to think that the most sleep deprived person would be writing an article on sleep but hey, a job's a job.

_Later…_

Levi typed away at his keyboard for a while, occasionally pausing to stare out of the window in a futile effort to distract himself. The rain began to pour harder, with droplets streaking down the dirty windows. The sky darkened, making seem like nighttime outside, and the buzz of cars echoed in the back of Levi's mind. _Sigh. _Levi shut one of his desk drawers with a slam. He ran out of coffee grinds in his desk so he had to go to the nearest coffee shop and grab himself a cup of coffee before he passed out on his desk.

_Knock. Knock. Knock. _Hanji peered through the glass walls of the office before letting herself in with a tray of cookie. Erwin entered the room soon after, with one of Hanji's cookies in hand. He was dressed in a grey business suit, with a blue tie, and his dirty blonde hair was slicked back with hair gel. Hanji futilely waved a biscuit in from of Levi's face and poked him with it. Levi pushed away from his desk and sighed, crossing his arms.

"To what do I owe the pleasure?" He said in a sarcastic tone. Erwin leaned against the table and reached for another one of the cookies on the platter. Hanji sat down on one of the chairs opposite the desk.

"Do you do anything but work, Levi? This is the 5th night in a row that you haven't had a good night's rest." Erwin twirled around a teaspoon in his coffee cup. Levi raised an inquisitive eyebrow towards him.

"Yes, I haven't slept because of work. However, I wouldn't have slept anyways so why not be productive with my time." He started to sort through some of the papers on his desk. "My articles are still top-quality, are they not?" He questioned. Erwin stared at him for a second, shifting positions in the chair.

"Yes, they are excellent quality as always. But I'm becoming concerned over your physical health." He paused, looking at Levi with empathy in his eyes. Levi squirmed under his gaze. "You can't go on like this, Levi. Living off of energy drinks and coffee. You are going to crash." Erwin stated simply. Levi stared at the floor, acknowledging this, before Hanji spoke up as well.

"You need to get a girlfriend." She stated. Erwin began to laugh hysterically. From the sound Erwin was emitting, Levi was glad the glass walls were sound proof. Levi began to blush, turning away from the two of them.

"Levi? A Girlfriend? You are talking to the guy who specifically avoids emotional interactions with people at all costs. For Christ's sake, he flipped off that chatty intern Linda after she wouldn't shut up about her new diet." Erwin bursted out. Hanji began to giggle and Levi was trying not to smile.

"Oh, come on, we both know she was annoying with her 'smoothies and salads are the next big thing' bullshit. And I don't avoid people." Levi stated, standing up to grab one of the cookies from the platter. "I just don't find a need to create unnecessary emotional messes." He concluded, biting down on the cookie. It was oatmeal, his favourite which no one else liked. Hanji always remembered. She just stared at him blankly, and rubbed her temple.

"I swear, I am going to make you a dating profile and find you someone myself if I have to. You need someone looking out for you." She stood up, picking up the platter of cookies and started towards the door. She stopped for a moment, cracking open the heavy, corrugated glass door slightly. "Oh, and I found your hand sanitizer storage the other day. I borrowed one or two…or five. Good luck on the article!" And she was off. Erwin stood up, shaking his head. He was considerable taller than Levi, standing 6'2" at his full height.

"You look like you are going to faint. Here, take your lunch break now. Its only 20 minutes early. Go to that coffee shop nearby that you love and grab something so you don't die, and meet me at that sushi place a couple blocks down. Ill meet you there in 30 minutes with Hanji. Don't be late." He joked, waltzing out of the office. Levi sighed, grabbing his coat and saving the document, before filing a couple papers into his desk. He walked down the corridor and into the elevator. He looked at himself in the mirror, combing through his hair with his hand. _I'm 75% coffee and 25% hand sanitizer at this point. _Wrapping his scarf around his neck, he stepped out of the elevator and made his way out the building and down the street. Just ahead was the small, quaint coffee shop he loved so dearly, just as the rain began to fall.

_Later…_

Levi stepped into the small coffee shop and folded his black umbrella, shaking some of the water off of it. He wiped his feet on the door mat, stepping into line. _The Aristocrat's Cup _it was called, and it served the best coffee in New York. It was decorated in a Parisian style, with fake street lights and a cobblestone patterned floor. Flowers hung from baskets near the window and outside of the shop. Wine bottles hung from the ceiling with incandescent light bulbs inside lighting the shop, and tables had fresh flowers in ornate vases. The walls were painted with the scene of a street in Paris at night, with bustling restaurants and a view of the Eiffel tower lit up in the back. They served the most amazing pastries and there was always a line, no matter what time of day.

Levi stepped up to the cash register and ordered a black coffee and apple pastry. The cash register dinged with a satisfying noise and the barista handed him $1.25 in change.

"Is that for here or to go?" She asked him, reaching for one of the plastic cups on the corner of the counter. Levi thought for a minute and then shook his head. _He had time to enjoy some coffee._

"To stay, please." He replied. He turned to sit at a small table in the back. He sat down and looked around the shop, waiting for the barista to bring him his coffee. The shop was busy as usual and recently, many of the university students from the university nearby came to stop and for study for exams. Although it was full of people, it was always near silent. After all, this shop received reviews and criticism equivalent to that of a high end restaurant. In one corner was a group of friends with their neuropsychology textbooks out, discussing the functions of the human brain. In another, a group of women sat chatting during their lunch break. However, Levi's eyes flickered over to a table nearby, where another young man sat with his gaze focused intently on his laptop. He was typing away, never looking up for a second and occasionally sipping from his cup. _A graduating student, _Levi thought as he saw the "end of the course" texts that the boy had strewn out on the table. But it wasn't the complex anatomy books the student was studying that interested him so deeply. It was the boy.

He was handsome, maybe in his early twenties. Ruffled brown hair complimented his peach coloured skin. His eyes were beautiful; a teal green colour that shown with radiance and youth. He wore a pair of thick rimmed glasses, as well as his school uniform; a light blue undershirt with a gray cardigan and grey pants. He looked to be quite a bit taller than Levi, yet he was slimmer, with less muscle mass. Levi found himself uncontrollably staring at the boy's lips in a trance. And something about his eyes made him want to melt. He scratched his head. He remembered those eyes from somewhere. He had seen this boy before, in some other lifetime perhaps.

Levi couldn't take his eyes off the brunette for the duration of his stay at the shop. Occasionally, the brunette looked up and once, their eyes made contact. He wanted to look away and not seem like a stalker but he couldn't. The two of them looked into each other's eyes for what seemed like forever. Something about his eyes was just _mesmerising. _Levi began to feel a bit dizzy and light headed. Thoughts and emotions ran through his head before the café door swung open, and the little bell rang. A shorter boy with his long blonde hair pinned back in a bun, walked in with his Law textbooks in hand. Levi coughed. _A lawyer in the making._ To him, lawyers were just uptight know-it-alls.The boy had pretty blue eyes, walking up to the brunette and tapping him on the shoulder. The brunette looked up and smiled. The two of them exchanged a bit of inaudible conversation before the brunette backed his books in his back and slung it over his shoulder. When the two of them left the shop together, Levi decided he would wait a couple minutes and then leave himself. The barista came over with his steaming coffee, apologizing for the delay. It didn't matter, because Levi had forgotten about his order all together.

He sat in silence and drank his coffee, staring at the floor. He wanted to punch himself in the face, burying his head in his hands. _Why did I do that? He probably thinks I'm a creep. _Levi stood up, putting on his coat and leaving a tip under the cup. He stepped out of the café door and started walking towards the subway station nearby. But he couldn't get the boy out of his head. He shook his head in frustration, pushing past the crowd of pedestrians. _Why do I care what that boy thinks? I'll probably never see him again. He was just another person, right? Just another boy. With beautiful green eyes. And an amazing smile. _

Levi started down the stairs at the subway station. For the first time, he felt butterflies in his stomach. He was so confused and his head was spinning, throbbing. Everything sped up and he felt like he was moving in slow motion. He made his way down the stairs and onto the platform, glancing at his watch. _15 minutes should be enough to get to the sushi house. _He pushed through the people and stood at the front of the crowd, a couple of steps behind the yellow limit line. All of a sudden his head began to swirl, and he felt nauseous. Claustrophobia set in and he felt the walls of the subway system bending and warping, closing in on him. He felt his heart beat racing. _Badum. Badum. Badum. Badum. _The lights of the subway station warped around him, encasing him in light until all he could see was white. Individual conversations became swirled together as one large hum. And then it all went black.


	2. Chapter 2 - Derailed

**Philophobia - Chapter Two**

**Eren's POV**

Rain poured down from the sky, encasing the bus in layers of water. Windshield wipers beat back and forth at a hurried pace, while the old bus driver sighed, turning on his left turn signal. The public bus was chalk full of people trying to make their way to work on this miserable day. Eren stood near the back of the bus, grabbing on tightly to the handrail with one of his hands. A black messenger bag was slung over his shoulder, and he had his phone in his hand. He looked down at the small screen, as it dinged with a new message from his friend Armin.

_Meet you at the coffee shop in an hour, just gotta finish up some work. I have something to tell you. _The message popped up surrounded in the usual grey chat box. Eren sighed. Armin was always trying to do set him up with someone or go out to do something crazy. Last time Armin texted him that he had something for them to do, Eren ended up cliff diving (he was pushed off actually) at the nearby lake during a college party. It was definitely something to fall off a 10 meter cliff half-drunk _and survive_.

The bus shuddered to a stop, bringing all the people to lean forward. Eren glanced up at the banner reading the stop name and terminal. _Now approaching 5__th__ Avenue. 5__th__ Avenue Terminal. _The bus opened its doors and let out air from the tires, lowering the bus. Eren pushed pass other riders, and stepped off the bus. He started to run towards the front door of the shop as it was still raining outside. Quickly, Eren dashed under the overhang and pushed the door open. A little bell went off above him as he wiped his feet on the doormat and stepped into line. It was busy as usual, with nearly every table occupied and a line up at the cash register. Eren watched as an old lady argued with the barista about her having exact change, whilst digging through her purse to find the 3 nickels she was missing. Eren sighed, observing the surroundings. He loved this little Parisian shop that lay at the heart of the city. The service and coffee here was amazing and the manager of the shop had clearly put a lot of effort into designing it. As people slowly ordered their coffee, Eren found himself in front of the cash register. The barista smiled at him, beaming pearly white teeth. She had pretty blonde hair which cascaded down to her shoulders and big, blue eyes. _She looks like Armin. _Eren shuddered at the thought, and spoke.

"One Latte, Please. To stay." The barista nodded, writing down his order on a piece of paper and handing it to someone working a coffee machine in the back. The cash register dinged loudly as $3.50 appeared on the little screen. Eren handed her a 5 dollar bill, took his change, and turned to sit down. He looked around for an empty table and spotted one in the corner near the window. Eren set down his bag at the side of the table and pulled up his laptop. He opened it, turning it on and reaching in his bag for his textbooks. _Advanced Psychology, Guide to Human Anatomy, The History of Neuroscience Volume II _poured out onto the table, just as the barista came over with his steaming coffee. "Thank you" he nodded, reaching for the cup. Eren sipped his coffee, flipping through his textbooks to pages he marked with sticky notes. He was a student, graduating University with a degree in Psychology, and his finals were next week. So naturally, he was freaking out. So far, he was able to achieve high 90's in his course but he always became tense around exam week. Eren opened up his document of notes and began to type away, as the watch on his hand spun around in circles and time seemed to speed up.

After about an hour of studying, Eren sat back in his chair, staring at the ceiling. His brain felt fried, and all he wanted to do was sleep. To make it worse, a group of chatty females sat in one corner of the shop, discussing how one of their friends got engaged. Giggles and Squeals emanated from that corner, so loud that Eren thought they would have been kicked out. Just then, the doorbell rang as someone opened the door and wiped their shoes. Eren looked over, expecting to see another one of the chatty females enter. He couldn't have been more wrong.

A young man entered, in a long black trench coat. He unbuttoned his coat and folded up his umbrella. He was dressed in a tight black suit with a red tie, so Eren assumed he was a business man from one of the nearby offices on break. He was short but incredibly handsome, with long black hair in an undercut outlining his slim face. He had blue-grey eyes and pale, white skin. From what Eren could see of his arms from his rolled-up sleeves, he was packing heat. Toned &amp; muscular yet slim, this business man had been working out. Eren felt his cheeks flush red, thinking that the man must have had defined abs underneath his black dress shirt. In fact, he didn't look much older than Eren himself. The man turned around and took a seat at one of the center tables. He had very feminine, defined features like a crisp jawline and a small nose, but he looked intimidating and unapproachable. Like a rattlesnake ready to snap. He had thin lips, which curled up to the faintest memory of a smile.

Eren could only shake his head and run his hand through his hair, racking his brain for memories. He _knew _that smile. He had _loved _that smile. He knew this man, and everything about his and loved everything about him but at the same time, he knew nothing. He was a stranger, whose worlds collided for the second time in their eternity. In some lifetime, they had been together and known each other. He searched his mind but all he could draw was a blank space at his face. As the man surveyed the room, Eren's eyes quickly darted to his laptop screen as he continued to type something about electrical pulses. He felt frustrated and angry that he couldn't remember anything about the man, mentally cursing at himself. It wasn't until a couple minutes had passed that he realized the man had been staring directly at him.

Eren looked up from the laptop and came eye to eye with the mysterious man. It felt like time stopped for the moment, and his heart skipped a beat. Now that Eren could directly focus on the man, he realized that the man was even more attractive than he had previously thought. His narrow blue eyes stared at him, seemingly looking through his soul. Eren suddenly felt nervous and intimidated yet at the same time, he felt anxious, feeling his entire body burning up as the man looked him up and down before smiling. He felt an anticipation like never before which confused him greatly. He heard a voice reach out through the back of his mind and he felt a cool breeze against his cheeks, as tall grass ruffled softly in the slight wind. And just like that he was transported in the middle of an empty field stopped in time. Eren looked around, staring at the faded clouds which rolled over the grey sky. _A memory? _In front of him was a white presence, completely white, like a missed spot on the canvas. The presence took on the shape of a human, and spoke in a soft hushed tone. They sounded as if they had been crying, their voice rough and scratchy and full of hurt.

_I love you. I love you with all my heart. I know that you would never fall in love with someone like me. No one cares about me, but I care about you so much. You consume my thoughts and with my father's abuse, I have nothing else to live for. I can't run away and leave my mother with that monster. Sometimes I think to myself, _The presence paused, as if holding back tears. _Sometimes I think it would be easier to kill myself. Instead of enduring this torture. Maybe it would be easier. _The presence sat in silent and began to shake. Eren's head was subconsciously swimming with emotions. He wanted to scream from the bottom of his core, "I love you. You cannot kill yourself because I need you. I want to spend every day with you. We should just run away together and escape this. I can't let him do this to you. It tears me apart to see you broken like this and I feel like I can't do anything to protect you." However, Eren couldn't manage to strangle out a sound from his mouth and sat in silence. He felt tears roll down his cheeks and an overwhelming burning feeling in his chest. _Ding!_

The Café door swung open and in bounced Armin, snapping Eren out of his trance. He looked over, as Armin waved to him and came to sit at his table. The blonde had a book bag full of Law and Literature books, as well as binders of notes. Armin was panting, as he ran here from the nearby library. Beads of sweat dripped down his forehead, which was usually covered by his cascading bangs, now pinned back in a bun. Eren leaned against his arm, feeling nauseous. _Was that a memory?_

"Eren, you'll never believe it. You know the big party next Friday after Exams, at that big frat house on campus?" Armin breathed out, wiping some water off of his jacket. Eren shrugged his shoulders.

"Yea, what about it?" He questioned. Armin wasn't usually the type to get involved with frats, thinking of himself as "too good" for them, so this inquisition intrigued him.

"Well, we're going with some other people. This party was invite only and I have some friends in that frat. You remember Jean?" Armin asked. Eren simply scoffed, crossing his arms.

"That asshole? I don't even know why you are friends with that good-for-nothing jock."

"He's alright once you get to know him, Eren." Armin pouted.

"Yea, that's what you think. You haven't had him try and date your sister." Eren replied, sipping his coffee. He glanced across the room to the business man, who was staring out the window in his own little world. Armin sighed, clearly exasperated.

"Just try not to get flat-out wasted this time, alright? I do not need a repeat of Eren the Drunk Parkour master." Armin said, smiling to himself a smug smile. Eren chuckled, closing his laptop.

"Don't worry, I won't try to jump off a building again. No promises on bridges though." Eren felt Armin elbow him in the rib. "Come on, don't we have a seminar to go to?" Eren asked. Armin looked at him, his eyes growing wide in realization.

"Oh my god, I almost forgot about that. Yea, we gotta go if you don't want to be late. Let's take the subway, I think it's the fastest." Armin suggested. Eren nodded and they stood up. Eren putting on his grey jacket, and slinging his bag over his shoulder. He took one last glance at the man in the corner. _Hopefully he's a regular customer so I can talk to him next time I come here. I need to know who he is. _He glanced down at his watch. _11:04. _The seminar was at 11:45, so the two of them hurried out of the shop and down the street to the nearby subway terminal.

_15 minutes later…_

Eren dashed down the stairs into the subway terminal. It was busy per usual, every possible space occupied with late-afternoon commuters. In the distance, a jackhammer pounded away at the cement floor. They were renovating this station, resulting in closed lines and more traffic. Dust from the cracked cement rose up and filled the air, creating a suffocating layer of paint filler and dirt. In one corner, old moldy tiles peeled from the wall, with an old man scrapping them off and replacing them with new bricks. A cement roller sat in one corner, with workers paving over the rusted cement floor. Eren looked above to see a scaffolding full of glass panes, with another worker installing a skylight.

"It's gonna be nice when it's done." Armin spoke out, reaching into his bag to grab his subway pass and hand it to the teller. A machine scanner beeped, and Armin pushed through the metal turnstile. Eren handed the lady change for a one way ticket, the same change he received from the coffee shop. He pushed through the turnstile, shoving his ticket into the front pocket of his bag, and hurrying through the rush of security standing around the little box office. A gust of wind invigorated Eren as a subway train pulled in to his left. It came to a screeching halt and with the _whoosh _of air being let out of the hydraulic breaks, the doors opened. Eren watched as almost instantaneously people were pouring out of the small, cramped train like fish from a broken net. New people quickly flooded in to the replace the old, filling every possible space. And quick as lightning, the train was off, leaving a mess of people in its haste.

Eren pushed through towards the front of the crowd waiting on the right side, just in front of the yellow line. There were only a couple minutes until the train was supposed to arrive anyway, and he needed the seats. Armin trailed behind him, trying to squeeze his way through people twice his size. As Eren waited at the front with his phone in hand, he noticed that one of the commuters seemed odd. They were swaying a little bit, as if intoxicated, and were stepping a little bit too close to the edge. It took Eren a split second to recognise the same man he had seen in the coffee shop from the dark, long trench coat he wore. The man turned around, and Eren saw that he had turned a sickly colour of white, the colour of fresh fallen snow, and he had a glossy look in his eyes, as if he couldn't focus properly. Alarms started going off in Eren's mind. _Something is wrong. Is he having a stroke? _He watched as a thin line of tears streamed down the man's cheeks before the man lost his balance and tumbled over the edge.

Screams enacted from the crowd and a wave of people surged to see what had happen. The man was laying sprawled on the train tracks unconscious, with blood seeping from the back of his head as well as his nose. People were screaming for someone to help, but he was nearly two meters down on the tracks. Eren felt sick to the stomach, nearly throwing up when he heard the announcement that the train would arrive in a minute. Eren gulped down a thick layer of saliva that lined his throat. His heart beat hard in his chest, raising his pulse and overwhelming him with anxiety. He couldn't let this man die here. Not after he just saw him at that coffee shop. _All these cowards are calling for help but no one will save him. _Eren thought spitefully. He couldn't live with himself if he didn't do anything. He heard the words of the white presence echoing through his being. _I love you. I want to be with you. _He sighed, summing up his courage as he made his decision, jumping over the edge.

He landed on the tracks with a dull, metallic thud and quickly began to analyze the situation. _This guy is much shorter than me, so he should be lighter. _Eren glanced up at the looming edge of the platform, which stood above his head. Faces of terrified members of the crowd peered over, yelling for Eren to get up. _I'll hoist him over my shoulders and push him over, and then climb up myself. _Eren quickly began to grab the man and pull him up and over his shoulders, so that his head rested on Eren's neck and his arms drooped over his collarbone. He felt the cold shallow breathing of the man on his neck and shivered. _His breath is ice-cold. _Armin pushed out of the crowd and gasped, dropping to his knees.

"EREN! God, get out of there! The train is just down the tunnel!" Armin's face turned a sickly yellow as he saw the man that Eren was carrying, hanging limp over Eren's shoulders with blood trickling from his nose. "OH MY GOD. Hurry, I'll lift him up! Bring him over here! Someone, call an ambulance!" He screamed, tears lining the brims of his eyes. In the distance, the rumble of a train could be heard. It made the track vibrate with an intensity that made Eren weak in the knees, almost dropping the poor man. He stood up shakily with the man on his back, who was slightly heavier than expected, and trudged over to the edge of the platform. He lifted the man and pushed him up with all his might, to which Armin and a couple others pulled him up. Just then, the headlights of the train became visible at the end of the tunnel. Eren began to panic, grabbing anything he could along the side wall, to help him up. He grabbed a pipe, only to have it burst, spilling water everywhere and soaking him. Eren fell backwards and, in an attempt to maintain balance, twisted his ankle. The feel of the rusty train tracks as he fell was like a swift punch in the face. It felt like rusty knife being dragged across his skin. The train whistles went off as it became bigger and bigger, speeding towards Eren with an unstoppable momentum.

Eren felt light headed, hyperventilating and panicking. If he didn't get out now, he would be flattened. He stood up, feeling broken yet with a passion in him to live that he never felt before. The train was only 50 meters away. Suddenly, a large arm reached down from the crowd above and grabbed Eren's wrist roughly, yanking him up with a force that almost dislocated his shoulders. Eren skidded over the edge, just as the train sped past creating a rush of wind that ruffled his hair. He panted heavily and fell back against the linoleum floor, shutting his eyes tightly. _That didn't just happen. That DID NOT just happen. _He looked up to see the stranger who pulled him up, a tall man with short, silvery-blonde hair and hazel eyes. The man smiled and chuckled, offering Eren his hand to pull him on his feet. Eren shifted his weight onto his good ankle and meekly stood up.

"Boy, you should be more careful. You almost got yourself killed." He scratched his chin, with the earliest signs of stubble appearing. "But you did save that man. Do you know him?" The blonde man asked, lifting Eren onto his feet. Eren shook his head, as the man shot him a surprised look. "Really? Well, I can tell you one thing son. You've got guts. I don't know of anyone who would risk their lives like that for someone they don't know. Papers will be all over it." Eren nodded slightly, not really paying attention to what the man was saying. He turned his attention to the crowd of people standing around a spot on the floor. Eren limped over to them, and pushed the people aside. Armin sat in the middle, checking the man's pulse. When he heard the murmur of the people silent as Eren arrived, he quickly turned around with his eyes growing wide. He leaped up, pulling Eren into a tight hug, nearly knocking the breath out of him. Tears were running down his face as he began to sob into Eren's chest.

"I…I thought you were dead. I thought the train ran you over. Never do that again please. It's too dangerous." Armin whimpered, muffled by his sobs. Eren wrapped his arms around him, holding him tightly. The blonde was always over-sensitive. When their friend Marco passed away about a year ago because of a motorcycle accident, he cried for months and only recently had gotten over it. Armin carried all the sorrow of the world on his sleeves and felt a deep-rooted empathy.

"How is he? The man who fell." Eren asked, glancing down. Armin wiped tears from his eyes and regained his composure, pointing over to the man lying on the floor.

"His heart rate is slow and irregular. It's skipping beats at odd intervals and beating about as slowly as someone in a coma. I think there's something seriously wrong." Eren bent down beside the man, staring at his face and checking his pulse for himself. It took him about a minute to find the faint beat. The beeps of the train's doors echoed in the distance, and more people poured out, staring at the spectacle. Armin shuffled over, clearing his throat. "I called an ambulance and they should be here soon. Do you still wanna go to th-"

"No, it's alright. You go and take notes, and send me them. I think I'm gonna stay with him and go with him to the hospital to see what's wrong." Eren chuckled to himself. "The police are bound to ask me a million questions anyways." Armin shut his mouth and nodded, grabbing his bag of books and waving Eren a goodbye as he boarded onto the nearby train.

Sirens of an ambulance could be heard in the distance as a group of paramedics made their way down the stairs with a stretcher in hand. Behind them, a row of police men hurried down and began to question bystanders of what happened, jotting down notes on little notebooks. Shaken whispers filled the air of the station, as the commuters recounted to the officers about everything that had just happen. The paramedics pushed through the crowd and took a good look at the man. One of the chief paramedics, an older man with a beer belly, whistled to himself.

"Well, what the hell happened here." He questioned, as some of his assistance began to unfold the stretcher. They began to hoist the man up onto the stretcher, connecting him to various cables and tubes that measured his heartrate and other medical levels. The chief grunted and turned to face Eren. He had an old, weary look on his face and he smelt like cigarette smoke. He wore a dark blue uniform, with all sorts of badges lining the arms and chest area. Around his waist hung a baton, a hand gun and a bunch of other utility items. He coughed a thick, dry cough, throwing his cigarette onto the ground and crushing it under his foot. "We received a call that a man had fainted over the edge and that another man had jumped down to save him. I'm assuming you are the one these folks are talking about?" The officer asked. Eren nodded, hesitantly, as the chief's expression lightened up. He patted Eren on the back with one loud _thump_, and began to laugh. "You, my friend, are a hero. Jumping down to save this man where no one else would. That is bravery. Tell me a bit about what happened. What's your name kid?" The police man questioned, shifting his position and pulling out a notepad.

"Eren…Eren Jaeger. I'm a senior student at the nearby university, Chroma Hills. You see, I was waiting down in this terminal for that exact train to come so that I could make it to this seminar on time when this man up and fainted on the tracks." Eren shuffled his feet. _I'd rather not tell him about the coffee shop. Or that weird memory. _"I couldn't just let him die there without trying to help. So I jumped down and pushed him up before climbing up myself. And then you guys arrived." Eren concluded, gazing over at the man, now hooked up to an IV and a breathing apparatus. The chief made a harrumph sound, and nodded, shoving his note into his pocket before reaching for another cigarette. He rummaged through his utility belt for his lighter as he spoke to Eren.

"Well, you can be sure you'll make the headlines kid. If you want to come with us on the ambulance to the hospital, you should know you are more than welcome." The man asked, puffing a whisp of smoke into Eren's face. Eren nodded and the two of them walked up the stairs and towards the ambulance parked outside the terminal. Eren looked up, noticing that the clouds had cleared and a beautiful blue hue engulfed the sky. The sun shone brightly, beginning to dry up some of the puddles. Eren breathed in the fresh air, emptying his lungs of the mildew-filled air that was in the subway. He stepped up onto the ambulance, taking a seat near the head of the vehicle. He fastened the seatbelt tightly and looked down at the man. He had a bandage wrapped around his head, covering one of his eyes, and was breathing rather shallowly. Eren felt uneasy that only half an hour ago, this man had been just fine in the coffee shop, and now was in a near coma-like state. Eren reached over and grabbed the man's hand as the ambulance started to move. He wrapped his warm fingers around the dainty, ice-cold fingers of this business man that lay before him. Ever so slightly, Eren felt the grip of the man tighten and watched as a look of content and peace was painted across his face.


	3. Chapter 3 - IV's and Black Tea

**Philophobia – Chapter Three**

**Levi's POV **

Darkness. Engulfing darkness that clouded out all other thoughts and sucked all light out of this world. Levi felt asphyxiated, like he was squeezed between two walls, slowly having the air pressed out of his lungs. He couldn't move his body at all, or feel it for that matter. A wave or uneasiness passed over him. In the back of his mind, he heard a high pitched noise. It sounded like someone was dragging rusty nails across a chalkboard. At first the sound was distant but as it grew closer and louder, Levi turned circles in his mind, dropping to his knees and covering his ears. He needed to get the sound out of his world before it consumed him.

And all of a sudden, the sound ceased. Levi looked up. He was standing in the middle of an empty farm field. There was an eerie yet peaceful ambiance that cloaked the area. It was completely silent, with no sounds whatsoever other than the wind rustling grass. This world was slightly faded, like all the colours were distorted to a sort of murky shade of browns and beige. The sky was a solid grey colour, littered with clouds here and there. Almost as if Levi was looking at it through pictures of an old analog camera. He looked down to see that he was wearing a frayed cotton shirt and a pair of tight, ripped jeans. He never remembered wearing anything like this. Anything this _simple. _He shivered, realizing that his skin was ice-cold and as pale as a ghost. The clothes he wore provided no warmth and Levi felt his body going numb. The long, wild grass swayed in the slight breeze, creating a sea of ripples throughout the field. In the corner of his eye, Levi saw an old willow tree right in front of a white fence. He began to walk towards it, his footsteps making a crunching sound against the dry, gravel-like dirt. As he walked up to the tree, he felt the rough bark. On the center of the trunk was an engraving. _I'll see you again one day. _Levi ran his shaking fingers over the letters, trying to remember them and where he'd seen them. He sat down at the base of the tree, leaning against the trunk. He felt an overwhelming feeling of fatigue and déjà vu. It felt almost as if someone was trying to force his eyes shut with all their might. As if he was seeing something he wasn't supposed to. Gravity tripled, pinning him against the tree so that he couldn't get up, but he was too exhausted to complain. He felt as if he could fall asleep and never wake up.

This scene seemed so familiar yet he couldn't place his finger on where he had seen it. He grew up in the city all of his life, never even visiting a farm. To the left of him was an old farmhouse, rotting from decay. Paint was peeling off the walls and an old rusted car sat in the gravel driveway, leading to a road in the distance. He paused, and listened. He could hear voices coming from inside the house. Sounds of screaming and shouting and the sound of glass breaking. He strained his ears to try and make out their conversation, but all he heard was white noise. And then, a gunshot rang out loud and clear. Its whine pierced the air, ending the silence of the peaceful atmosphere. Levi's ears rang and for the moment, he couldn't hear anything. All of a sudden, he felt a deep, burning feeling from his chest. It was much worse than anything he'd ever felt before, as he doubled over in pain. He looked down, mortified to see a huge, red stain in his shirt from the left side of his body. Peeling the shirt away from his body, he was shocked to see that he had a gaping wound in his left side that was bleeding profusely, as well as several other bruises. But the thing that shocked him most was that the wound had an exit point. _It's a gunshot. _Levi thought, wide-eyed in realization. Slowly, he began to feel his heart slowing and the world becoming distorting. It was as if the layers of old film had run out and this projection was coming to an end. In his last moments of subconciousness, he saw a figure in the corner, jumping the border fence. They ran up to him and began crying, falling to their knees. They picked up Levi and held him close to their chest. And for the first time in this world, Levi felt a real warmth. He listened to the heartbeat of this person, and let the smooth rhythmic movements lull him to sleep. _Badum. Badum. Badum._ Levi's eyes fluttered shut and he heard his own heart flat line.

_Badum. Badum. Badum. Badum. Badum…_

And then he was in the hospital. He woke up with a sweat, his eyes bursting open as he struggled to take breaths. He looked down to see his arms linked up to the IV system. Sacs of blood and other fluids hung from the metal stand beside his bed. He was wrapped under layers and layers of blankets and still felt cold. When he looked at the computer monitor that sat across his bed, it read that his heart rate was 67 beats a minute, which even Levi knew was slow. His hospital room was small yet nice, with a table in the corner and a large window facing the city skyscrapers to his right. Sunlight streamed in, creating a peaceful atmosphere. Levi let his head fall back and stared at the ceiling. _What was that dream? I've dreamt before but nothing so vivid and real. _He thought to himself, before he looked to the corner of the room near the doorway.

The boy in the coffee shop was standing in the corner of the room, smiling (and blushing?) at him. Thoughts started racing through Levi's head as a look of confusion painted his face. _Why is that boy here? Did I do something? God, did he complain about me to someone… _Just then, the doorknob of the room jiggled and turned, and a doctor walked him. He smiled at Levi, shutting the door and pulling up his clipboard. He exchanged a short bit of inaudible conversation with the boy in the corner, before they came to sit down at the table near the window. Levi turned his head to face the boy, as the doctor adjusted his glasses and spoke.

"Well Mr. Ackerman, you must be very confused as to why you're here." The doctor chuckled as Levi nodded his head slightly. "Well, what do you remember of earlier today? Start from the beginning please." The doctor asked, clicking his pen.

"I woke up early. Got dressed and ate before going to work. After a couple hours, it was my lunch break. I headed that little Parisian café downtown for a coffee," He paused, seeing the boy shifting in his seat and blushing even harder. "…and then I was going out for sushi. I went down to the subway and then blacked out. I don't remember anything else." He finished, reaching for the bottle of water beside his bed. The doctor nodded, writing down a note on his clipboard. He sighed, looking up to come face to face with Levi.

"Mr. Ackerman, do you know who this man is?" He said, pointing to the student siting across the table. Levi swallowed hard and shook his head. He felt some tension from the room release, and the doctor made a quiet "harrumph" sound.

"This is Eren Jaeger, a student at the nearby university, Chroma Hills." He looked over to Eren, who simply waved his hand in Levi's direction. "Earlier today, you fainted on the subway tracks." In that moment, Levi felt his stomach flip over. _I fainted again. This is getting dangerous. If Hanji knew, she would flip. _The doctor continued. "Eren did something incredible that I can say I've never seen anyone do. He jumped down onto those tracks and lifted you up to safety before narrowly climbing up over the edge. If it weren't for him, you wouldn't be here today."

Those words hit Levi like a punch in the gut. That boy, Eren, had _saved _him. He didn't even know his name or who he was, but he risked his life for Levi. Slowly, Levi felt tears form in his eyes and slowly roll down his cheeks. And just like that, he was sobbing. Bawling his eyes out like a little child realizing that because of his carelessness not to get his fainting problem checked out, he could have killed this hero who jumped to save him. Eren noticed that he began sobbing and shivering and he got up, walking towards Levi, sitting on the corner of his bed. He opened his arms wide, gesturing for Levi to hug him. On a normal day with anyone else, Levi would have refused and made up some excuse. But today, he just felt so worn down. So beaten and broken. He felt useless, like he couldn't even manage to save himself. He fell against Eren's chest and grasped him tightly, sobbing murmurs that sounded like 'thank you' and 'why'. Eren pulled him in tightly, and rested his head on Levi's. After a couple minutes of silent embrace, Levi sat up and wiped his tears away. He had gone tomato red, embarrassed that he would let anyone see him at such a weak point. The doctor coughed and continued, pulling up an MRI of a heart.

"You see Levi, if I may, you have what's called a restrictive cardiomyopathy. It's a rare condition where your heart is swollen and weakened because the heart muscle near the bottom of your heart is hardened. This means it's harder for your heart to contract and pump blood, leading to a weaker, less-oxygenated body." He pointed to the MRI of a normal heart and Levi's heart. Levi could see that his heart was larger near the bottom and the layer of muscle lining the wall of the heart was very thick. "When your heart cannot pump enough blood for the rate at which your body needs it, you will faint, which is what happened earlier today. You also suffer frequently from arrhythmias and you have an unstable heartbeat. Sometimes, your heart will randomly skip beats, leading to your abnormal beat." The doctor tried to smile at Levi, but he could clearly see the look of distress on his face.

"Now, I need you to know that although it is rare, this disease isn't particularly harmful to your health. Your heart should function as normal as long as you do not participate in intense cardio activities, like triathlons. However, you should come in to check up every 2 weeks to make sure that you are in proper health. You are checked into this hospital for the night so that we can monitor your levels and will be released in the morning." He clicked his pen back, and handed Levi a medicinal bottle of blue pills. "These are for whenever you are feeling light-headed, or if you feel like fainting again. They should help regulate your blood flow. They are prescription, so when you run out, come in for a new prescription." The doctor stood up and patted Levi on the back, smiling. "Now I'll go, and leave you two to talk it out. Have a nice day." He said, leaving the room in a flash. Eren scratched his head and adjusted his glasses. He smiled at Levi, blushing from ear to ear. He chuckled softly, staring down at Levi's face.

"I guess I haven't properly introduced myself. Hi, I'm Eren Jaeger, nice to meet you. I'm 5'10", a Pisces and a psychology student. I think that sums me up." Eren chuckled. Levi smirked and pulled himself up, leaning against the backboard of the bed. He outstretched his hand for Eren to shake.

"I'm Levi Ackerman, but call me Levi. I'm 5'3" sadly, and I write articles for the nearby paper. You know _Time Magazine?_" He questioned, and Eren simply scoffed.

"You say the name like it's a small local newspaper, instead of an international magazine. I'm pretty sure I've read a couple of your articles regarding neuroscience. You are a really talented columnist, and _so_ humble." Eren joked, shifting his position so that Levi could see him better. Up close, he really was handsome. His messy hair fell perfectly onto his face, and his eyes were just stunning. Levi laughed, hanging his legs over the edge of the bed.

"Yea, I guess. However, I'm forever in your debt for what you did today. I cannot express how thankful I am and I feel so bad that I could have killed you if you weren't quick enough." Levi's face took a solemn expression, and he stared down at his feet. The room became silent for a moment. "Why did you do it? Why did you jump? You didn't even know me." Levi asked. Eren watched as tears formed in his eyes again. He cleared his throat and stared out the window.

"I don't know, to be honest. I just felt something in me was lit. I felt like I recognized you at the coffee shop. In that moment when you looked over at me, I felt like I'd known you forever. As if you were an old friend, whom I'd forgotten. And I couldn't shake the feeling even when I got to that station. Then I saw you again, only you had fallen. I knew no one would save you and so I just felt it in me that I had to do something to help you." He suddenly stopped, and Levi starred at him. Eren turned to face him, with a look of pain on his face. "You know that feeling when you know someone but you can't remember from where or when and it just burns so bad?" Eren asked. Levi watched as his eyes glossed over with tears, and he shifted to sit a bit closer to him.

"I know exactly how you feel. That's how I felt when I saw you. Look man, I may not remember, but I know you. And I'm so thankful that I looked over to your table." Levi finished, patting his back. Eren nodded in agreement before standing up. "Now that we are 'best friends', why don't we go out somewhere? Like a bar or something? Let me at least buy you a drink." Levi suggested, as Eren smiled back.

"Sounds like a great idea." Eren said, reaching into his bag beside the bed for a paper and pen. He hastily scribbled down something and handed it to Levi. _A number? _Levi thought, reading the paper closely. Eren had remarkable writing for a guy, very bubbly and loud. Eren shrugged the bag over his shoulder and started towards the door. "Call me or text me, I really don't care. I gotta go though because I was supposed to head over to a seminar today but I kind of missed it while saving your ass, Princess." He smirked, tilting his head slightly and resting his hands on his hips. Levi chuckled, sliding back under the covers.

"You know, it's a good thing you're cute." He said, resting his head against the pillow. Eren blushed hard as Levi waved farewell, with a grin of satisfaction on his face. Eren waved back smiling as he slid through the door. And he was gone. Levi sighed, burying his face in the pillow. _Today was insane. I wonder what Hanji would say if I told her. She would probably scold me for being careless like my mother, ugh. Erwin would just make fun of me for having to be saved. _Levi turned to face the window. The sun was just beginning to set and it coloured the horizon with beautiful colours of reds, oranges and yellow. The glass windows of the skyscrapers created a myriad of colours that made it seem so magical. The clouds were painted with shades of purple and pink, and a lone airplane made its way across the sky. Levi stayed there and watched the sunset until he fell asleep and the first stars made their way across the evening sky.


	4. Chapter 4 - Bottles

**Philophobia – Chapter Four**

**Eren's POV **

_Two Weeks Later…_

The sun shone brightly through the blue tinted window of the university. The sky was clear, like a blank canvas, with the exception of the occasional bird. Eren stared out the third floor window and across the campus. In the center was a small cobbled square, with a fountain in the middle, and little outstretched paths that lead off in all different directions. To the left and right of the square were the dormitories, and the main building was straight ahead. Beside the dormitories were a couple of frat houses, including the Jock house. It had a huge "Chroma Hills Centaurs" ensigna painted on the side of it and a couple of the football players were sat outside, tossing around a pig-skin ball. The south path lead to a track arena, a soccer field and a swimming pool, as well as the student parking lot. The city park lay just beyond the soccer field, with more paths leading out to main intersections. Birch trees littered the place, their small buds blooming in the spring season. The ground near the trees was littered with browning leaves left over from the recent winter that were not yet cleared up. Most of the snow that remained had melted a few weeks ago and the weather had warmed up. Grass that had been dead over the winter period flourished with vigour and flowers sprouted out of the barren soil, giving new life and colour to the solemn landscape. Peeking over the evergreen hedges, Eren could see the gardener tending to the bushes near the dormitories which finally got a well-needed trim since winter had ended. In another corner he could see students moving boxes out of the dorms and into their cars. The students who were finishing their degree this year were moving out, emptying rooms for new students. Eren was saddened to think this would be one of the last times he would see this place. This campus had become his home over these past six years, and he felt a certain attachment to its grounds. The people here felt like the family he never had.

Eren sighed and returned his gaze to his Psychology exam. He had proof read it twice and made sure that all the answers were correct. All his grammar was in check and he hadn't missed any questions. Eren tapped his pencil on the desk as he read over some of his multiple choice. _How long can a single string of nerve endings extend? What are three signs physical and psychological signs of the onset of depression? If a patient has symptoms of …, what condition might they have? _ He was about to glance up at the clock when the bell rang, signifying the period and exams as being over. A synonymous click of pencils hitting the desk and groans of relief escaped the room. The teacher chided over from her desk about not moving until she had come around to collect all of the papers. She pushed out of her desk in her office chair and dragged herself up, grabbing the folder in which the papers would be submitted along with the scantrons. Eren glanced around the room to see faces of relief, of happiness, of worry and fear. He stretched back on his chair, extending his arms back and letting out a small groan. Once all the papers were collected, the teacher signaled the class that it was over and that they could leave. Eren grabbed his backpack and got up from the desk, taking one last look outside the window before exiting the classroom. He felt a little part of him stay behind in that classroom, walking into the dim corridor.

As he paced through the halls, Eren felt certain bits of nostalgia. Everything from the way the banner saying "Chroma Hill Centaurs" hung crookedly in the main hall, to the druggie bathroom that smelled heavily of weed and other illicit substances. He remembered moments and memories from each place. He walked down the hallway, past the bright blue lockers and the classrooms, and suddenly he was flooded with a wave of emotions. He remembered little things, like finding mystery love notes in his locker from a mystery admirer in his freshman year, only to find out it was just Jean's prank. He remembered big things too, like the day that Armin came out to him crying and sobbing as he told him about his crush on one of the jocks. So many memories were made in this place, and now he had to leave it all behind. The iron beams of the school's skylight cast dark and long shadows down the hallway, as the sky filled to the brim with clouds.

As Eren turned the corner, he opened his locker up for the last time, retrieving any pencil cases or books he had forgotten to clean out this weekend. Staring for a while at his old Psychology books in his hands, he shut the door and locked it. _So it's all over then. _ He slipped on a sweater before continuing down the hallway and out the nearby door. Eren breathed in the fresh spring air, which hit him like a wall from the humid air of the indoors. He made his way down a set of stairs and down the gravel path through the campus towards the center square. As the wind picked up slightly and began to blow around left over leaves, he saw Armin sitting at the base of a large tree in front of the English hall. His long hair was down, and waved in the wind. He appeared to be reading a Sherlock novel, as his features were contorted in a look of extreme concentration. Eren shook his head and smiled. _I never understood how he likes those books._

"Armin!" Eren called over, waving in the direction of the blonde. Armin suddenly looked up confused, before waving back at Eren. As Eren jogged over, Armin stood up, wiping and dirt or dried grass off his pants. He smiled a big grin up at Eren and hugged him tightly, almost knocking him over.

"How did your exam go?" Armin asked, looking up at Eren. Eren simply shrugged and let go of him, tilting his head to the side.

"I don't know, but I think that I did well. There wasn't a question that I didn't know and I read it over twice, so there shouldn't be any mistakes. How about you?" Eren asked, "Did old Ms. Keith give you a run for your money? I heard she wrote that exam herself." Eren nudged Armin in an attempt to spook him, but he simply shook his head.

"Nah, the exam was easy. I'm pretty sure I got perfect." Armin finished, brushing it off like it was nothing. He stared up at the sky for a moment, seemingly lost in thought. "It's over, oh my God. It's finally over. All those years of studying gone into one end of a tube and a degree out the other." He joked, stopping to stare at the tree he had been sitting under. The wind quieted down, forming a silent blanket over the bleak landscape. Armin put his arm up onto the tree trunk and sighed, patting the rough bark as if it were a dog. "I'm gonna miss Jerry." He said, his tone changing as if he was leaving his pet behind. Eren raised his eyebrow.

"You named the tree?" Eren said unamused. He stifled a small laugh, but Armin only scoffed.

"Of course I named the tree. Who do you think I am?" He said jokingly and they both laughed. It felt good for Eren to laugh and get this bittersweet feeling off his chest. "I'm gonna miss this place." Armin said in a sorrowful tone. The wind picked up and rustled the branches of the old tree, as it creaked under its own weight. Eren nodded in agreement and shoved his hand into his jacket pocket.

"Me too. It feels so weird to say we are graduates. Seems as if yesterday was our first day here. God, I feel so old now." Eren chuckled, shoving Armin a little bit. "Remember that day? When you made me sit with you near the soccer field to watch the jocks play their game. Under this tree." Armin sighed and nodded, a look of sadness spreading across his face as his hair blew in the wind.

"Under Jerry. And to think that they are going to cut him down soon because he's a-" Armin changed his voice to sound like one of the annoying female teachers that taught Environmental Studies, cocking his head slightly in a mocking manner. "_Hazard to the health of the students." _He finished, stifling a small giggle out of Eren, who was staring down at him with mischievous eyes.

"You should stop before someone hears you." Eren grinned, poking Armin in the rib. "The tree might be gone but the memories aren't." Eren finished, starting down the path towards his car waiting for Armin to fall in suit. Armin nodded and they made their way down to the student parking, where Eren had his car. They walked past the empty fields in silence for a couple of moments before Armin burst out, startling Eren in the process.

"Oh my god, I almost forgot. The frat party. It's tonight." He breathed out, startling Eren. Eren sighed, staring down at his feet, a look of annoyance spread across his face. He kicked at a small stone, watching as it bounced down the pathway.

"Do I really have to go? You know I don't care much for stupid drunk jocks." Eren whined, a hint of irritation in his voice. He stared daggers down at Armin, who sensed his aggravation at the subject. Armin gulped unsteady under his gaze.

"Yes, of course you do. Some of our other friends will be there too so don't worry, you won't be alone. Annie, Reiner, Bertholdt, Sasha and Connie are coming for sure. Ymir and Christa might too if they aren't busy. And who knows, maybe you'll be able to finally get another girlfriend. Your last one was kind of a bitch." Armin stuck out his tongue giggling as Eren shoved him against the chain link fence.

"She was not. Just because you didn't like her doesn't mean she was a bad person. She just wasn't for me." He shrugged, pulling out the car keys from his pocket and clicking the unlock button. Eren owned a blue smart car, which sat in the corner of the lot. It wasn't the manliest thing ever to own a smart car but hey, he always loved the look of small city cars. He opened the door and slid in, unlocking the door for Armin's side. Armin slid his books into the back, and pulled out his phone. Once they were both in and fastened their seatbelts, Eren started up the car and backed up out of the lot.

"How's about we go out to that café you love so much for a quick lunch and then go back to our flat to chill and get ready for tonight?" Armin suggested, as Eren drove off the school grounds and onto one of the main streets. He changed lanes to the center of the street and speed up, making his way towards downtown.

"Sounds like a plan. But you are buying me cake." Eren insisted, flicking on his signal and turning the corner. He scanned the skyscrapers in his rear view mirror and searched for a road name sign. Armin laughed and nodded in agreement as they made their way down the busy street.

_Later That Night…_

_Whoosh. _The warm shower water enveloped Eren like a warm hug. Streams of water trickled down his back and abs, forming little rivers on his arms and making their way down to the floor. He close his eyes and ran his hair under the water and reached for some shampoo to lather his hair. As he stood in the stall, he thought about the party. Eren loved parties as much as the next college kid, but something about this one made him want to throw up. _Maybe it's because Jean is there, _he thought to himself. He hated everything about him: his jackass personality, his lack of charisma, the testosterone that seemed to drip from his body. All frat boys got so rowdy when drunk. Eren remembered when Jean started hitting on his sister Mikasa and then egged her car when she wouldn't go out with him. _That was fun to clean up. _Eren reached for the body wash and began to lather up his chest and arms. _I just have to make sure not to get stupid drunk again. _Last time, Eren jumped off a two story bridge into a river. Surprisingly, Eren was a decent swimmer drunk.

Eren paused for a moment, slamming his fist into the shower wall. _What am I going to do about that damned dream? _For the past couple nights, Eren had had a horrible reoccurring dream that he could faintly remember. Bits and shreds of him wandering through darkness before coming upon an empty field. In the corner was a large tree that blew in the wind, the only living thing in the desolate world. The air was stagnant and time had seemed to stop. And all of a sudden there was a bang and he had felt as if his heart had been ripped out. A terrible sadness befell upon him to which he hadn't known why. He felt tears streaming down his face as he saw a faint figure in the distance, at the base of the tree. But as soon as Eren would run to the figure, they would disappear and the dream would seem to fall apart as Eren fell into a black void. Then he'd wake up in a cold sweat and wouldn't be able to fall asleep for the hour.

This dream had plagued him for the past week and Eren was suffering because of it. Tormented with fatigue and exams, Eren was pushed to the point of utter exhaustion. Armin banged on the washroom door, as Eren was brought back to reality.

"Hurry up in there! We gotta go." He muffled through the door. Eren stared at his reflection in the silver showerhead, eyes widening. _Holy shit, I'm almost as pale as Levi. Need to go out to the beach soon. _He turned off the water and reached for a towel and began drying his body and hair. He didn't generally have to style his hair. A quick brushing usually put it in check. His hair was naturally tousled and no matter how much you tried to straighten it, it would remain wavy. Armin tried many times without success. He stepped out onto the shower mat and wrapped the towel around him, opening the bathroom door. A front of cold air hit him, causing goosebumps to appear all over his body. He shivered in the air and walked down the hall to his bedroom. He peaked into Armin's room and saw the blond putting his hair up into a bun.

Eren walked through the doorway into his room and shut the door. He walked across the room and fell on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. His room wasn't particularly big but it was comfortable. There was a dresser, a bookshelf and his desk on one corner of the room. His bed and end table sat against the far wall, with a big window looking out of the apartment building. They were on the 11th floor, allowing for a beautiful view of the garden and park at the center to the city, next to the university campus. His entire room was blue, white and silver. Blue had been Eren's favourite colour since he was a little boy, although he could never figure out why. He pulled the white blinds on his window shut and walked over to his closet to find something to wear. He picked out skinny jeans and a blue/green flannel and got dressed as quick as he could. As he slipped into his white converse, he went to knock on Armin's door, only to have it open before he could even make a sound. Armin adjusted his black sleeveless blazer. He wore a red collared shirt and tight black jeans. He scoffed at Eren and pointed to the watch on his wrist.

"Come on, we should go. We are already late." He began down the hallway and reached for their coats, tossing Eren's to him. Eren slipped his arm into the sleeve of the oversized leather jacket. "I still don't understand why you take an hour in the washroom. You don't even do your hair or anything. Where do you get off to, man? Narnia?" Eren reached for the keys which sat on the table next to the entrance.

"I don't know, I was just thinking. Day-dreaming you could say." He flicked off the lights, exiting the flat and locking the door. He tossed the jingling keys into his pocket and they started down the hallway and past the parallel doors of their neighboring apartment. Armin pulled out his phone.

"Considering we are probably going to be wasted, should I get an Uber? No point in taking the car there if we aren't going to take it back." Armin suggested, pulling up the app on his phone. Eren simply nodded. The next thing he needed was a DUI. As they got to the end of the hallway, two elevator doors stood up against the opposite wall. Eren pressed the downwards arrow button and they waited in silence as Armin ordered an Uber. Eren stared at his reflection in the hallway mirror, concluding that he needed to shave the stubble on his face. The elevator came a couple minutes later and the two of them made their way down to the lobby. It was already dark outside, and a couple stars shown bright against the devoid sky. The Uber came a few minutes later and they were off to the frat house.

_Later…_

The black car pulled up to the building, and Eren could already see that the party was underway. Peeking through the tinted windows of the car, he saw rave lights flashing from inside the house. The entire house was teepeed with toilet paper, and broken bottles of alcohol littered the dead grass. The front windows were smashed, as if someone had rammed through them and obnoxiously loud music blared from within. _Good thing they don't have neighbours. _Just outside of the main entrance, a drunken girl was passed out on the lawn. Eren felt his head throb at the sound of the loud music booming from the speakers. He staggered slightly, putting his hand up against his temple.

"Eren, you alright? You look pale." Armin asked, a look of concern spread across his face. Eren shook it off, sighing.

"Yea I just… haven't been sleeping well the past couple nights."_ He couldn't tell Armin of the weird reoccurring dream that plagued him just yet. _ He sighed and paid the Uber, thanking him for the ride.

They exited the car and as Eren shut the car door, a gust of chilling wind ruffling his hair. The heavy stench of vodka protruding from the house burned his nostrils. He turned to see Armin smirking at him, elbowing him in the rib as they walked up the path.

"That's what you're gonna smell like in about 15 minutes." He joked, walking past Eren and up to the doorstep. The doorway was wide open and the party was in full swing. As Eren walked through the doorstep, he was immediately confronted by a blond girl in a skimpy black dress. She was wearing far too much eye makeup for Eren's taste, and her shoes looked like they belonged on a stripper pole. Stains from missing her mouth while taking shots covered her dress, and she had a couple hickeys on her neck. As she opened her mouth to speak, the scent of tequila shots wafted past Eren and made him want to gag.

"Hey cutie, what's your name? D'you wanna hook up?" She hiccupped, leaning herself up against Eren's side, before collapsing to the floor. Eren shook her off and continued forward. There were so many people that Eren could barely breath, let alone walk. He was pushed up against the bodies of other students looking for a fun night. As Eren tried to shove through, he was met with a couple grunt and groans from other students.

"Watch where you're going, faggot." A buff senior called out. As Eren looked around in the sea of people jamming to a song the DJ was playing, he noticed that he had already lost Armin. _Perfect. And I haven't even been here for 5 minutes. _He attempted to look over the heads for the petit blonde but it was no use. _Maybe I'll find some of our other friends, _Eren concluded.

Eren walked down the hall and past a couple making out on the couch towards the kitchen area. Out on a table were laid shots of various liquors and cans of cheap beer sat in a large metal tub filled with ice. Further back was a refrigerator filled with other various alcohols. _Boy, am I going to need to get shit faced to stand this terrible music. _Eren pulled open the fridge and searched for something to drink. _Whiskey, Champagne, Gin, Scotch, Vodka. _He reached in the back and grabbed a bottle of Jager. _Time to live up to my name I guess. _As he poured himself a glass, he looked up to see Connie and Sasha, two of his friends. Sasha was wearing a tight blue dress, her hair up in a ponytail while Connie was wearing a polo with board shorts. Sasha waved at him and smiled as Connie raised his cup.

"Eren! There you are. Hitting the bottle already I see." Connie joked, pointing at the bottle of Jager. "I don't understand how you can stand that stuff. It tastes like shit man." Eren shrugged, putting the bottle back in the fridge.

"I don't know, maybe it's just in my genes." He stifled a laugh. He downed a swig before speaking again. "I guess you just have to be really drunk to actually enjoy this music." He said, gesturing to the room next to them. Terribly loud dubstep played with the speakers turned up so high that the floor was vibrating from the bass. Connie nodded in agreement.

"That's true. Anyways, how are you man? It's been ages since I've seen you. How did your finals go?" He asked, grabbing another beer from the tub.

"I've been fine, although I haven't slept well the past couple nights. Finals were great. I mean, they were hard as expected but I knew everything so I did well. Probably." Eren answered, running a hand through his hair. He leaned back against the counter, taking another sip.

"Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you." Sasha spoke up, eating a slice of pizza from the various boxes laid out all over the place. "We saw you on the news. We heard that you saved that famous newspaper editor."

"That was amazing, Eren. I don't think I would ever have enough balls to do that. You're a hero. Everyone has been talking about that." Connie added, his eyes full of admiration. Eren pushed it off, downing his cup and reaching to refill it.

"There was someone who needed help and I decided to help them. It's not all that miraculous." He answered, leaving Connie shaking his head, dumbfounded.

"Wait, so what happened after? Are you guys' friends now or something?" Connie asked. Eren shrugged, setting down his cup.

"I dunno… I mean, I have his number and we said we'd get together some time to go out to a bar and say our proper hello's but I've been so busy lately that I haven't texted him. You know, with exams and all." Eren was actually wondering himself when he would meet Levi again. _Maybe I'll call him tomorrow, if I'm not hungover, _he thought.

The door swung open and slammed against the wall, causing Eren to jolt from shock. A very drunk Jean stumbled into the room, the stench of alcohol drifting from his clothes. He seemed upset, though Eren couldn't understand why.

"Yeah, let's hear more about Eren the hero." He pushed up against Eren, a stupid grin spread across his face. "So humble is he, that no one can be compared to him." Jean pulled at Eren's cheeks, forcing his mouth into a smile. Eren tried to push him off, only to have Jean snap up and grab his arm, forcing him against the wall. "Shouldn't you be smiling and enjoying yourself, hero boy?" Jean said in a sickeningly sweet voice. He brought his mouth up to Eren's ear, breathing hot breaths as he whispered. "I feel that the hero deservesss a present." Eren could feel the tangent alcohol on Jean's lips as he forced himself onto Eren, pinning Eren's arm against the wall, causing a small yelp to escape Eren's lungs as his eyes shot open.

Swiftly, Eren kneed Jean in the crotch and pushed him off, causing him to bang into the fridge and knock a bunch of cups off the counter. He fell to the floor, shards of glass implanting themselves into his hands and knees. Connie's mouth hung open. Eren wiped his mouth in disgust, kicking Jean in the stomach, causing him to throw up a little onto the cold linoleum.

"Fuck off, you drunk bastard." Eren spat at him, walking out of the room, signalling for Connie and Sasha to follow. Jean got up and propped himself against the door frame, clearing vomit from his mouth. He reached out and grabbed Eren tightly by the wrist.

"C'mon man, I'm sorry. I didn' mean to upset you. Let'ss just have a good timeee." He slurred his words, struggling to form a sentence. "I don' wanna ffight you righ' now…" He put his arm over Eren's shoulder and pulled him into a big room. Eren pushed him off, seeing Armin in the corner. He was talking to some more of their friends over a beer. He started to walk but then quickly felt a wave of dizziness and nausea come over him. _What the hell? I'm not even that drunk. _He staggered forward until he had to prop himself up against a couch. Armin spotted him and walked over to him, punching him in the shoulder.

"Aww come on now, you aren't shit faced already. Come on, let's go dance. It's your turn on the funnel." Armin said, gesturing to the group of students crowded around a beer funnel. When Eren didn't move, he stared at his friend's face for a moment, sobering up slightly. He waved his hand in front of Eren's face and snapped his fingers a few times. "Hey, you ok? What's wrong, Jean spiked your drink?" Armin asked, pulling Eren's arm over his shoulder so that he was supporting him. Eren faltered and leaned over to throw up, but his throat felt as dry as sand. Regaining some strength, he nudged Armin off him and shook his head, smiling weakly.

"I'm alright, just a bit shaken up. You said there's a funnel?" Eren said. Armin nodded, feeling the mood relax. _I'm not gonna let one of those stupid dreams ruin my night, _Eren thought. "Direct me to it. It's time to get the party started!" Eren yelled, getting some cheers from other students. Eren bent down as Armin handed him the end of the funnel. Cheap booze started to flow down into Eren's throat, soothing his feeling of dry mouth.

The rest of the night was scattered into vague shreds of memories. The more Eren downed, the more he felt himself lower his inhibitions. Soon, his nausea was completely gone and he found himself jamming to the trash the DJ played. He remembered hazy parts of the night. At one point he was playing beer pong with the jocks, and at another he was taking shots of 160 proof Rum. There were obscure memories of skinny dipping in the hot tub and he vaguely remembered playing spin the bottle and 7 minutes in heaven. Near the end of the night, he ended up picking a fight with Jean and his groupies. Harsh words were thrown from both sides before they got physical. He threw a couple hard punches at Jean and in return, received a bloody nose and a couple bruises. The last thing he remembered was stumbling outside into the city park and collapsing on a hill beside an old willow. His vision was getting increasingly blurry yet he could see a figure in the distance walking towards him, his eyes closing. That's when Eren blacked out.


End file.
